Ok let me get it out of my system: MIND NUMBINGLY BORING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm talking about the projections on the sails of the Opera House.
For those of you who haven't been there yet this year: skip the Opera House and go directly to the Museum of Contemporary Art (MCA)! At least it would be worth the cost of the parking and the half an hour walk (since the train station at Circular Quay was closed yesterday) from the CBD.
Let me just explain in a few words: the projection on the sails of the Opera House this year is of an asian couple, boy and girl (although the boy appears for only a couple of minutes) doing some gymnastics.
Nothing strenuous, just a couple of stretches, one leg raised, an arm rotating and that's it.
YEP, no kidding, THIS IS IT!
Forget about the stunning colours and forms that gave life to one of the most amazing light shows in the past couple of years for the Vivid Sydney festival.
Forget about the choreography behind the scenes, the perfect shape and direction of the lights, the warmth of the shades and the innovative ideas that took place in the months of preparation to make this festival a celebration of this amazing city that is Sydney.
Forget about never getting tired of the ever changing images, some evocative, some out of this world, some so rich in colour that they would make you doubt the possibility to even set your camera on them and try and recreate those fabulous effects through the lens.
This year is all about a couple of healthy exercises, of the kind you do in "soft" gym classes, right after your spinning session or your zumba madness, just to fill in the gap between the main reason why you went to the gym and the moment in which you can finally go back home and take a shower.
Let me tell you how it ACTUALLY went:
We got there early, not really knowing what to expect, I had seen one or two photos of the Opera House with a person on it and I thought to myself, oh this could be cool.... for a while.....
When the lights went on at 6pm we were right below the main sails, noses up and cameras ready.
At the beginning nothing happened, there was just a light on the sails and the shadow of the people passing in front of its source.
Since this went on for a bit I said in what was meant to be a joke :"Not much money this year".
Immediately on my left a woman answered :"It should get better!".
I certainly hope so! I thought, and we resumed the wait.
And then finally.... the gym exercises.....
Ok, for the first couple of minutes we all giggled, ahaha there's a person on the opera house! mmmm I wonder when the good part will start....
After half an hour we were all like:"Is she still there?", "Yep, still there!".....
Some kids next to us were yelling bo-ring bo-ring in chorus, it was actually quite catchy! One of them was doing some sort of improv song with sentences like "This is so bo-ring to-ni-i-ight... this is boooooring toniiiight.... bo bo boooring...."
Photographers were shaking their heads in disbelief, parents were nervously getting rid of their sense of guilt for dragging their kids to this painfully lame gig by buying more and more ice cream cones, couples on their first dates that got there in the hope of scoring a second one thanks to the romance of the past years' events were probably thinking of someplace else to go in order to salvage the night.
And then it happened!!!
No, they did NOT change projections, unfortunately, what happened was that everyone LEFT!
You know the mass migrations seen so many times on tv? All those wildebeests squeezing past each other in the attempt to get as fast and as far as possible from the open jawed crocs waiting for them in the river?
That was us yesterday when we all decided to flee the scene!!! Women and children first!!!! And then the photographers with all our paraphernalia of tripods we didn't even bother to take out of the cover!!! And then the pervs when they finally got tired of hoping to sneak a peak up the girl's shorts!!!
And you know what the saddest part is? That it's all true! I'm not even exaggerating for humour's sake!
We went to check all the other installations to spend some time and keep an eye out in case someone got wise and changed the projections but NO, she was always there...... doing her exercises.
Actually no, that is not the saddest part. Far more sad is the fact that we're not talking about a wall on a random building, this is the Sydney Opera House we're talking about!!!!!!!
By far the most beautiful Opera House in the world, one of the most amazing man made creations ever seen, THE ICON of this city, one of the most recognised building in the planet and the reason why 99% of Europeans believe that Sydney is the capital of Australia.
One wonders if these kind of things shouldn't go through some good thinking before giving it the green light. Is this the way we cherish our city? Is this the way we hope to beat Melbourne as the culture capital of the country?
I'm not saying that's not art, I'm just saying it's BAD art!
SO BAD it's not even edgy! it's not even provocative bad, just plain boring BAD!
And it was just a meagre consolation that the projections on the Museum of Contemporary Art (MCA) were actually pretty good (very good the scene reminiscing Fritz Lang's Metropolis!) and that a couple of other installations got our full attention.
Anyway for what it's worth, a link to my photos of the even will follow shortly.
I'm talking about the projections on the sails of the Opera House.
For those of you who haven't been there yet this year: skip the Opera House and go directly to the Museum of Contemporary Art (MCA)! At least it would be worth the cost of the parking and the half an hour walk (since the train station at Circular Quay was closed yesterday) from the CBD.
Let me just explain in a few words: the projection on the sails of the Opera House this year is of an asian couple, boy and girl (although the boy appears for only a couple of minutes) doing some gymnastics.
Nothing strenuous, just a couple of stretches, one leg raised, an arm rotating and that's it.
YEP, no kidding, THIS IS IT!
Forget about the stunning colours and forms that gave life to one of the most amazing light shows in the past couple of years for the Vivid Sydney festival.
Forget about the choreography behind the scenes, the perfect shape and direction of the lights, the warmth of the shades and the innovative ideas that took place in the months of preparation to make this festival a celebration of this amazing city that is Sydney.
Forget about never getting tired of the ever changing images, some evocative, some out of this world, some so rich in colour that they would make you doubt the possibility to even set your camera on them and try and recreate those fabulous effects through the lens.
This year is all about a couple of healthy exercises, of the kind you do in "soft" gym classes, right after your spinning session or your zumba madness, just to fill in the gap between the main reason why you went to the gym and the moment in which you can finally go back home and take a shower.
Let me tell you how it ACTUALLY went:
We got there early, not really knowing what to expect, I had seen one or two photos of the Opera House with a person on it and I thought to myself, oh this could be cool.... for a while.....
When the lights went on at 6pm we were right below the main sails, noses up and cameras ready.
At the beginning nothing happened, there was just a light on the sails and the shadow of the people passing in front of its source.
Since this went on for a bit I said in what was meant to be a joke :"Not much money this year".
Immediately on my left a woman answered :"It should get better!".
I certainly hope so! I thought, and we resumed the wait.
And then finally.... the gym exercises.....
Ok, for the first couple of minutes we all giggled, ahaha there's a person on the opera house! mmmm I wonder when the good part will start....
After half an hour we were all like:"Is she still there?", "Yep, still there!".....
Some kids next to us were yelling bo-ring bo-ring in chorus, it was actually quite catchy! One of them was doing some sort of improv song with sentences like "This is so bo-ring to-ni-i-ight... this is boooooring toniiiight.... bo bo boooring...."
Photographers were shaking their heads in disbelief, parents were nervously getting rid of their sense of guilt for dragging their kids to this painfully lame gig by buying more and more ice cream cones, couples on their first dates that got there in the hope of scoring a second one thanks to the romance of the past years' events were probably thinking of someplace else to go in order to salvage the night.
And then it happened!!!
No, they did NOT change projections, unfortunately, what happened was that everyone LEFT!
You know the mass migrations seen so many times on tv? All those wildebeests squeezing past each other in the attempt to get as fast and as far as possible from the open jawed crocs waiting for them in the river?
That was us yesterday when we all decided to flee the scene!!! Women and children first!!!! And then the photographers with all our paraphernalia of tripods we didn't even bother to take out of the cover!!! And then the pervs when they finally got tired of hoping to sneak a peak up the girl's shorts!!!
And you know what the saddest part is? That it's all true! I'm not even exaggerating for humour's sake!
We went to check all the other installations to spend some time and keep an eye out in case someone got wise and changed the projections but NO, she was always there...... doing her exercises.
Actually no, that is not the saddest part. Far more sad is the fact that we're not talking about a wall on a random building, this is the Sydney Opera House we're talking about!!!!!!!
By far the most beautiful Opera House in the world, one of the most amazing man made creations ever seen, THE ICON of this city, one of the most recognised building in the planet and the reason why 99% of Europeans believe that Sydney is the capital of Australia.
One wonders if these kind of things shouldn't go through some good thinking before giving it the green light. Is this the way we cherish our city? Is this the way we hope to beat Melbourne as the culture capital of the country?
I'm not saying that's not art, I'm just saying it's BAD art!
SO BAD it's not even edgy! it's not even provocative bad, just plain boring BAD!
And it was just a meagre consolation that the projections on the Museum of Contemporary Art (MCA) were actually pretty good (very good the scene reminiscing Fritz Lang's Metropolis!) and that a couple of other installations got our full attention.
Anyway for what it's worth, a link to my photos of the even will follow shortly.
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